Called to Go Deeper
I am so grateful for community.
In hindsight what has kept me out of community, however much I longed for it was vulnerability. When you get burned so many times you just assume that you’ll move on alone with a harder exterior. But we all know you can’t avoid life. And the harder your shell the worse the experience.
A couple months ago I felt called to go deeper. I had prayed over and over, “Lord, find me my people. Find me those who I can go deep with. People who are walking with the Lord, but who are struggling everyday”. I’d like to say that this has just been a prayer of months…but I have been prayed FOR YEARS. My excuse being, “I am just not a girl who has girls for friends.” Becaaaause that would require me to be vulnerable. To put myself out there. To be judged. To be rejected. To be challenged.
Maybe it took me all those years to get to this place because God knew I wasn’t able to show my heart, therefore I wouldn’t be able to receive others at heart. Now I have gone into the trenches with other women who know what it feels like to fall short of the glory of God. We meet for a purpose. Maybe different reasons have called us together, but it makes things easier when you know everyone has the same intentions – being transparent with each other. Even if we all get there at different times.
“Yet even now,” declares the Lord, “return to me with all your heart, with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning; and rend your hearts and not your garments.” Return to the Lord your God, for he is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love; and he relents over disaster. Joel 2:12-13
I love the parable of the prodigal son. I can relate to both brothers. But one thing stands the same, God’s ability to celebrate me no matter what. His love runs deep. There’s one thing that is reassuring for sure when being vulnerable with God, is that I can trust that he will never turn his back on me.
I hope you find your place to grow in vulnerability.
Praying for you that you find your people.
Praying that you too will be called to go deeper.